{"id":812,"date":"2026-10-08T09:17:54","date_gmt":"2026-10-08T09:17:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/docvibanthan.com\/?p=812"},"modified":"2026-10-14T09:40:04","modified_gmt":"2026-10-14T09:40:04","slug":"lam-tinh-de-duoc-xac-nhan-tranh-bi-bo-roi-hay-ket-noi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/docvibanthan.com\/?p=812","title":{"rendered":"L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn, \u0111\u1ec3 kh\u1ecfi b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, hay \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style='padding-top:20px'><div class=\"taxonomy-category has-link-color dvbt-post-category wp-elements-1 wp-block-post-terms\"><a href=\"https:\/\/docvibanthan.com\/?cat=14\" rel=\"tag\">Tr\u00ed Tu\u1ec7 Nh\u1ee5c C\u1ea3m<\/a><\/div>\n\n\n<h1 class='wp-block-heading dvbt-article-title'>L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn, \u0111\u1ec3 kh\u1ecfi b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, hay \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i?<\/h1>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"dvbt-article-lead wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi th\u00e2n m\u1eadt c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 ba vi\u1ec7c kh\u00e1c nhau: xin m\u1ed9t t\u1edd ch\u1ee9ng nh\u1eadn, \u0111\u00f3ng m\u1ed9t kho\u1ea3n ph\u00ed gi\u1eef ng\u01b0\u1eddi, ho\u1eb7c g\u1eb7p m\u1ed9t con ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 th\u1eadt. \u0110i\u1ec1u quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh kh\u00f4ng n\u1eb1m \u1edf vi\u1ec7c ta l\u00e0m g\u00ec, m\u00e0 \u1edf vi\u1ec7c ta \u0111ang \u0111\u00f2i hay \u0111ang tr\u1ea3 th\u1ee9 g\u00ec.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-meta is-nowrap is-layout-flex wp-container-core-group-is-layout-3a88641f wp-block-group-is-layout-flex\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nguy\u1ec5n H\u1eefu Th\u00f9y Trang<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">08\/10\/2026<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-summary has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"dvbt-summary-label wp-block-paragraph\">T\u00d3M L\u01af\u1ee2C<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"dvbt-summary-content wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi th\u00e2n m\u1eadt c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 mang ba ch\u1ee9c n\u0103ng: \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn, tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, ho\u1eb7c k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i.<br>H\u01b0\u1edbng \u201cti\u1ebfn t\u1edbi \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t \u0111\u1eb9p\u201d \u0111i c\u00f9ng ham mu\u1ed1n v\u00e0 h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng b\u1ec1n h\u01a1n, h\u01b0\u1edbng \u201ctr\u00e1nh \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed3i t\u1ec7\u201d \u0111i c\u00f9ng ham mu\u1ed1n suy gi\u1ea3m. B\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng ch\u1ee7 y\u1ebfu l\u00e0 t\u01b0\u01a1ng quan, tr\u00ean m\u1eabu ph\u01b0\u01a1ng T\u00e2y.<br>\u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i b\u1ea3n \u00e1n: n\u00f3 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 g\u1ecdi t\u00ean v\u00e0 d\u1ecbch chuy\u1ec3n, b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u t\u1eeb c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi \u201cm\u00ecnh \u0111ang \u0111\u00f2i hay \u0111ang tr\u1ea3 th\u1ee9 g\u00ec?\u201d.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-body has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-main has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<div id='narcissus-echo' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Hai nh\u00e2n v\u1eadt c\u0169 trong m\u1ed9t c\u0103n ph\u00f2ng m\u1edbi<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Trong th\u1ea7n tho\u1ea1i <em>Metamorphoses<\/em> (Ovid, ca. 8 CE\/2008), ch\u00e0ng Narcissus si m\u00ea c\u00e1i b\u00f3ng c\u1ee7a ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh d\u01b0\u1edbi m\u1eb7t h\u1ed3. K\u1ec1 b\u00ean ch\u00e0ng l\u00e0 n\u00e0ng ti\u00ean Echo, ng\u01b0\u1eddi mang l\u1eddi nguy\u1ec1n kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 t\u1ef1 m\u00ecnh c\u1ea5t ti\u1ebfng, ch\u1ec9 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u1eb7p l\u1ea1i nh\u1eefng \u00e2m ti\u1ebft cu\u1ed1i c\u00f9ng t\u1eeb l\u1eddi ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c. Narcissus l\u1ea1nh l\u00f9ng kh\u01b0\u1edbc t\u1eeb Echo. N\u00e0ng hao m\u00f2n \u0111\u1ebfn m\u1ee9c ch\u1ec9 c\u00f2n l\u1ea1i m\u1ed9t gi\u1ecdng n\u00f3i vang v\u1ecdng gi\u1eefa n\u00fai r\u1eebng, c\u00f2n Narcissus t\u00e0n l\u1ee5i b\u00ean b\u1edd h\u1ed3, kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n g\u00ec ngo\u00e0i c\u00e1i t\u00f4i \u0111\u01a1n \u0111\u1ed9c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00e2u chuy\u1ec7n n\u00e0y th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c v\u00ed nh\u01b0 bi k\u1ecbch c\u1ee7a th\u00f3i \u00e1i k\u1ef7. Nh\u00ecn s\u00e2u h\u01a1n, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 bi k\u1ecbch c\u1ee7a hai con ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 g\u1eb7p \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c nhau. M\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u1ea7n m\u1ed9t t\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng \u0111\u1ec3 ch\u1ee9ng minh m\u00ecnh t\u1ed3n t\u1ea1i. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia thu m\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t ti\u1ebfng v\u1ecdng, v\u00ec s\u1ee3 r\u1eb1ng n\u1ebfu im l\u1eb7ng th\u00ec m\u00ecnh s\u1ebd b\u1ecb b\u1ecf l\u1ea1i ph\u00eda sau. H\u1ecd \u1edf r\u1ea5t g\u1ea7n nhau, nh\u01b0ng ch\u01b0a t\u1eebng c\u00f3 m\u1ed9t cu\u1ed9c \u0111\u1ed1i tho\u1ea1i \u0111\u00fang ngh\u0129a.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Hai nh\u00e2n v\u1eadt \u1ea5y kh\u00f4ng ch\u1ebft \u0111i c\u00f9ng th\u1ea7n tho\u1ea1i Hy L\u1ea1p. H\u1ecd v\u1eabn hi\u1ec7n di\u1ec7n tr\u00ean nh\u1eefng chi\u1ebfc gi\u01b0\u1eddng hi\u1ec7n \u0111\u1ea1i, d\u01b0\u1edbi nh\u1eefng c\u00e1i t\u00ean kh\u00e1c: nhu c\u1ea7u \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn v\u00e0 n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i. M\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi d\u00f9ng c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh l\u00e0m m\u1eb7t h\u1ed3. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia d\u00f9ng ch\u00ednh c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh l\u00e0m ti\u1ebfng v\u1ecdng. C\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ec1u l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh, nh\u01b0ng kh\u00f4ng ai th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh v\u1edbi nhau.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V\u00ec th\u1ebf, c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i \u1edf \u0111\u00e2y kh\u00f4ng n\u1eb1m \u1edf b\u1ec1 m\u1eb7t h\u00e0nh vi (l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh c\u00f3 t\u1ed1t kh\u00f4ng, bao nhi\u00eau l\u1ea7n l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ee7), m\u00e0 n\u1eb1m \u1edf \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n n\u1ec1n t\u1ea3ng: c\u1ea7n nh\u1eefng g\u00ec b\u00ean trong \u0111\u1ec3 m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi th\u00e2n m\u1eadt th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 l\u00e0 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i, ch\u1ee9 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i m\u1ed9t cu\u1ed9c \u0111\u1ed5i ch\u00e1c ng\u1ea7m? Ng\u01b0\u1eddi b\u01b0\u1edbc v\u00e0o ph\u00f2ng ng\u1ee7 v\u1edbi m\u1ed9t t\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng tr\u00ean tay, hay m\u1ed9t kho\u1ea3n ph\u00ed chu\u1ea9n b\u1ecb s\u1eb5n, th\u00ec d\u00f9 c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 c\u00f3 g\u1ea7n \u0111\u1ebfn \u0111\u00e2u, h\u1ecd v\u1eabn \u0111ang \u00e2n \u00e1i trong s\u1ef1 c\u00f4 \u0111\u1ed9c.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='chuc-nang' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi, kh\u00e1c m\u1ed9t ch\u1ee9c n\u0103ng<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nghe c\u00f3 v\u1ebb hi\u1ec3n nhi\u00ean, nh\u01b0ng ta hi\u1ebfm khi \u00e1p d\u1ee5ng \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y v\u1edbi ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh. Ta th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111o \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c b\u1eb1ng <em>h\u00e0nh vi<\/em> (t\u1ea7n su\u1ea5t, ai kh\u1edfi x\u01b0\u1edbng, k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng) m\u00e0 b\u1ecf qu\u00ean <em>ch\u1ee9c n\u0103ng<\/em> (h\u00e0nh vi \u1ea5y \u0111ang ph\u1ee5c v\u1ee5 nhu c\u1ea7u \u1ea9n s\u00e2u n\u00e0o).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">T\u00e2m l\u00fd h\u1ecdc v\u1ec1 \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c \u0111i theo h\u01b0\u1edbng ng\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ea1i. Cooper et al. (1998) cho r\u1eb1ng hi\u1ec3u m\u1ee5c ti\u00eau ph\u00eda sau cu\u1ed9c \u00e2n \u00e1i gi\u1ea3i th\u00edch h\u00e0nh vi t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n l\u00e0 ch\u1ec9 \u0111\u1ebfm h\u00e0nh vi. C\u00e1c \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 h\u1ecd kh\u1ea3o s\u00e1t g\u1ed3m t\u0103ng c\u01b0\u1eddng kho\u00e1i c\u1ea3m, th\u00e2n m\u1eadt, \u0111\u1ed1i ph\u00f3 v\u1edbi c\u1ea3m x\u00fac ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c, kh\u1eb3ng \u0111\u1ecbnh b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n v\u00e0 t\u00ecm s\u1ef1 ch\u1ea5p thu\u1eadn. Trong \u0111\u00f3, \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 th\u00e2n m\u1eadt g\u1eafn v\u1edbi h\u00e0nh vi \u00edt r\u1ee7i ro h\u01a1n, c\u00f2n \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 \u0111\u1ed1i ph\u00f3 g\u1eafn v\u1edbi h\u00e0nh vi r\u1ee7i ro h\u01a1n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Meston v\u00e0 Buss (2007) thu th\u1eadp 237 l\u00fd do m\u00e0 sinh vi\u00ean \u0111\u1ea1i h\u1ecdc \u1edf M\u1ef9 n\u00eau ra \u0111\u1ec3 quan h\u1ec7 t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c, r\u1ed3i gom th\u00e0nh b\u1ed1n nh\u00f3m: th\u1ec3 ch\u1ea5t, \u0111\u1ea1t m\u1ee5c ti\u00eau, c\u1ea3m x\u00fac, v\u00e0 b\u1ea5t an (insecurity). Nh\u00f3m cu\u1ed1i l\u00e0 t\u00e2m \u0111i\u1ec3m c\u1ee7a b\u00e0i n\u00e0y: l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh c\u00f3 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb, v\u00ec \u00e1p l\u1ef1c ngh\u0129a v\u1ee5, ho\u1eb7c \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">G\u00f3c nh\u00ecn n\u00e0y r\u00f5 h\u01a1n qua khung ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn v\u00e0 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh (approach and avoidance) c\u1ee7a Impett et al. (2005), nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u tr\u00ean c\u00e1c c\u1eb7p \u0111\u00f4i:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-concept-box has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><a href='https:\/\/docvibanthan.com\/?page_id=823'>Kh\u00e1i ni\u1ec7m<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn v\u00e0 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh (Approach and avoidance sexual motives)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Hai h\u01b0\u1edbng c\u1ee7a c\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi. Quan h\u1ec7 \u0111\u1ec3 ti\u1ebfn t\u1edbi \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed1t \u0111\u1eb9p (mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n g\u0169i, mu\u1ed1n chia s\u1ebb) \u0111i c\u00f9ng s\u1ef1 an l\u1ea1c c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n v\u00e0 ch\u1ea5t l\u01b0\u1ee3ng quan h\u1ec7 cao h\u01a1n. Quan h\u1ec7 \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u1ed3i t\u1ec7 (tr\u00e1nh c\u00e3i v\u00e3, tr\u00e1nh l\u00e0m b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh th\u1ea5t v\u1ecdng, tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf) \u0111i c\u00f9ng c\u1ea3m x\u00fac ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c h\u01a1n v\u00e0 quan h\u1ec7 k\u00e9m b\u1ec1n h\u01a1n theo th\u1eddi gian.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">G\u1ed9p hai khung n\u00e0y l\u1ea1i, ta c\u00f3 m\u1ed9t b\u1ea3n \u0111\u1ed3 \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ecbnh v\u1ecb ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class='wp-block-table dvbt-table'><table><thead><tr><th>Tr\u1ee5c c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi<\/th><th>\u0110i\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00f3 th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 h\u1ecfi<\/th><th>V\u00f9ng t\u00e2m l\u00fd t\u01b0\u01a1ng \u1ee9ng<\/th><\/tr><\/thead><tbody><tr><td>X\u00e1c nh\u1eadn<\/td><td>\u201cM\u00ecnh c\u00f3 \u0111\u00e1ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c khao kh\u00e1t kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/td><td>B\u1ea5t an v\u1ec1 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n (nh\u00f3m insecurity, \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 kh\u1eb3ng \u0111\u1ecbnh b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n)<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i<\/td><td>\u201cN\u1ebfu m\u00ecnh t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i, ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u1ea5y c\u00f3 r\u1eddi \u0111i kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/td><td>\u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh (avoidance), li\u00ean quan \u0111\u1ebfn lo \u00e2u g\u1eafn b\u00f3<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>K\u1ebft n\u1ed1i<\/td><td>\u201cM\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n ng\u01b0\u1eddi n\u00e0y, h\u1ecd c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/td><td>\u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn (approach), kh\u00e1t khao th\u00e2n m\u1eadt<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">X\u00e1c nh\u1eadn v\u00e0 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i tr\u00f4ng r\u1ea5t gi\u1ed1ng nhau \u1edf b\u1ec1 m\u1eb7t, v\u00ec c\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ec1u xoay quanh ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh. \u0110i\u1ec3m g\u00e3y n\u1eb1m \u1edf v\u1ecb tr\u00ed c\u1ee7a n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3: ta s\u1ee3 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh b\u1ecb ph\u1ee7 nh\u1eadn (x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn), hay s\u1ee3 s\u1ef1 t\u1ed3n t\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 b\u1ecb c\u1eaft \u0111\u1ee9t (b\u1ecf r\u01a1i)?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-counterpoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u1ea3n bi\u1ec7n: \u201cCu\u1ed1i c\u00f9ng ai c\u0169ng mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c y\u00eau v\u00e0 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c khao kh\u00e1t. Ph\u00e2n \u0111\u1ecbnh r\u1ea1ch r\u00f2i th\u1ebf \u0111\u1ec3 l\u00e0m g\u00ec?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nhu c\u1ea7u n\u1ec1n th\u00ec chung, nh\u01b0ng chi\u1ebfn l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ec3 th\u1ecfa m\u00e3n nhu c\u1ea7u \u1ea5y m\u1edbi t\u1ea1o ra h\u1ec7 qu\u1ea3. Gi\u1ed1ng hai ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f9ng kh\u00e1t: m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi u\u1ed1ng n\u01b0\u1edbc l\u1ecdc, m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi u\u1ed1ng n\u01b0\u1edbc bi\u1ec3n. C\u01a1n kh\u00e1t gi\u1ed1ng nhau, c\u00e1i k\u1ebft th\u00ec kh\u00f4ng.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='xac-nhan' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 th\u1ee9 nh\u1ea5t: L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn (ng\u01b0\u1eddi nh\u00ecn m\u1eb7t h\u1ed3)<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u00e2u h\u1ecfi ng\u1ea7m:<\/strong> \u201cH\u00e3y cho t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y t\u00f4i c\u00f2n s\u1ee9c h\u00fat. H\u00e3y ch\u1ee9ng minh r\u1eb1ng t\u00f4i c\u00f3 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V\u1edbi \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e0y, c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 v\u00e0 ham mu\u1ed1n c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 \u0111\u00edch \u0111\u1ebfn, m\u00e0 l\u00e0 b\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng. Cu\u1ed9c \u00e2n \u00e1i bi\u1ebfn th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t k\u1ef3 thi, n\u01a1i \u0111i\u1ec3m s\u1ed1 l\u00e0 m\u1ee9c \u0111\u1ed9 say m\u00ea c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia b\u1ecb t\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111i nh\u1eefng nhu c\u1ea7u v\u00e0 tr\u1ea1ng th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9c l\u1eadp c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t t\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu c\u00e1i t\u00f4i c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u1edfi x\u01b0\u1edbng.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u01a1 ch\u1ebf t\u00e2m l\u00fd.<\/strong> Kohut (1971) g\u1ecdi \u0111\u00e2y l\u00e0 nhu c\u1ea7u ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu (mirroring): \u0111\u1ee9a tr\u1ebb c\u1ea7n \u00e1nh m\u1eaft c\u00f4ng nh\u1eadn c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u0103m s\u00f3c \u0111\u1ec3 x\u00e2y m\u1ed9t c\u00e1i t\u00f4i v\u1eefng ch\u1eafc. Khi s\u1ef1 ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu \u1ea5y khuy\u1ebft thi\u1ebfu, ng\u01b0\u1eddi tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111i t\u00ecm \u201cg\u01b0\u01a1ng\u201d \u1edf kh\u1eafp n\u01a1i, t\u1eeb c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c, m\u1ea1ng x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i cho \u0111\u1ebfn gi\u01b0\u1eddng ng\u1ee7.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Crocker v\u00e0 Wolfe (2001) g\u1ecdi \u0111\u00e2y l\u00e0 l\u00f2ng t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n (contingent self-worth). Khi gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n treo v\u00e0o vi\u1ec7c \u201c\u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c th\u00e8m mu\u1ed1n\u201d, m\u1ed9t c\u00e1i nh\u00edu m\u00e0y hay m\u1ed9t tin nh\u1eafn ch\u1eadm tr\u1ec5 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t s\u1ef1 ki\u1ec7n b\u00ecnh th\u01b0\u1eddng, m\u00e0 th\u00e0nh b\u1ea3n \u00e1n cho c\u1ea3 con ng\u01b0\u1eddi m\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Nh\u1eadn di\u1ec7n qua ba th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list dvbt-list'>\n<li><strong>Tr\u01b0\u1edbc:<\/strong> h\u00e1o h\u1ee9c nh\u01b0ng k\u00e8m b\u1ed3n ch\u1ed3n (\u201ct\u1ed1i nay m\u00ecnh c\u00f3 \u0111\u1ee7 quy\u1ebfn r\u0169 kh\u00f4ng?\u201d). T\u00e2m tr\u00ed d\u1ed3n v\u00e0o ngo\u1ea1i h\u00ecnh v\u00e0 t\u00edn hi\u1ec7u t\u1eeb b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Trong:<\/strong> m\u1ed9t ph\u1ea7n t\u00e2m tr\u00ed \u0111\u1ee9ng ngo\u00e0i \u0111\u1ec3 d\u00f2 x\u00e9t: ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia c\u00f3 \u0111\u1ee7 say m\u00ea kh\u00f4ng. Kh\u00f3 ch\u00ecm v\u00e0o c\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c c\u1ee7a ch\u00ednh c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sau:<\/strong> ph\u1ea5n ch\u1ea5n ng\u1eafn r\u1ed3i t\u1ee5t nhanh. C\u1ea7n ki\u1ec3m tra l\u1ea1i b\u1eb1ng tin nh\u1eafn ho\u1eb7c \u0111\u00f2i h\u1ecfi th\u00eam \u00e2u y\u1ebfm. N\u1ebfu b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh l\u01a1 \u0111\u00e3ng, c\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c t\u1ee7i th\u00e2n k\u00e9o d\u00e0i.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-tradeoff has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0110\u01b0\u1ee3c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">M\u1ed9t li\u1ec1u t\u1ef1 tin t\u1ee9c th\u1eddi, xoa d\u1ecbu t\u1ea1m th\u1eddi t\u1ed5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng sau nh\u1eefng l\u1ea7n b\u1ecb ch\u1ed1i b\u1ecf.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">M\u1ea5t<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u00f2ng t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng ch\u1ec9 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c thu\u00ea, v\u00e0 h\u1ee3p \u0111\u1ed3ng h\u1ebft h\u1ea1n sau m\u1ed7i \u0111\u00eam, n\u00ean ta ph\u1ea3i \u0111i thu\u00ea l\u1ea1i. B\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh s\u1edbm mu\u1ed9n c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh b\u1ecb \u201cd\u00f9ng\u201d thay v\u00ec \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c g\u1eb7p, c\u00f2n s\u1ef1 ph\u1ee5 thu\u1ed9c c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 d\u1ea7n bi\u1ebfn th\u00e0nh ki\u1ec3m so\u00e1t.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-counterpoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u1ea3n bi\u1ec7n: \u201cAi c\u0169ng th\u00edch \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c mu\u1ed1n. V\u1eady c\u00f3 g\u00ec sai khi mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 g\u00ec sai. \u0110\u01b0\u1ee3c mu\u1ed1n l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m \u0111\u1eb9p, v\u00e0 trong m\u1ed9t m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 l\u00e0nh m\u1ea1nh, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 ph\u1ea7n th\u01b0\u1edfng \u0111i k\u00e8m ch\u1ee9 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i m\u1ee5c \u0111\u00edch. \u0110i\u1ec3m ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t n\u1eb1m \u1edf ch\u1ed7: n\u1ebfu thi\u1ebfu s\u1ef1 x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn \u1ea5y, ta s\u1ee5p \u0111\u1ed5 hay ch\u1ec9 bu\u1ed3n? Ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 n\u1ec1n t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng v\u1eefng th\u00ec th\u01b0\u1edfng th\u1ee9c vi\u1ec7c \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c mu\u1ed1n. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi d\u1ef1a v\u00e0o n\u00f3 \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1ed3n t\u1ea1i th\u00ec c\u1ea7n n\u00f3, v\u00e0 s\u1ef1 c\u1ea7n \u1ea5y l\u00e0m m\u00e9o c\u1ea3 cu\u1ed9c g\u1eb7p.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-example-box has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V\u00ed d\u1ee5 nh\u1eadp vai \u00b7 Khung Kohut v\u00e0 l\u00f2ng t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Lan v\u1eeba chia tay sau khi b\u1ecb ch\u00ea \u201ckh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n h\u1ea5p d\u1eabn\u201d. G\u1eb7p ng\u01b0\u1eddi m\u1edbi, \u0111i\u1ec1u Lan mu\u1ed1n bi\u1ebft kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i anh ta l\u00e0 ai, m\u00e0 l\u00e0 anh ta khao kh\u00e1t c\u00f4 \u0111\u1ebfn m\u1ee9c n\u00e0o. S\u00e1ng h\u00f4m sau, anh ta b\u1eadn vi\u1ec7c v\u00e0 nh\u1eafn tin ch\u1eadm. Lan s\u1ee5p \u0111\u1ed5.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>\u0110\u1ecdc theo Kohut:<\/strong> t\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng Lan c\u1ea7n kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu k\u1ecbp th\u1eddi, v\u00e0 nhu c\u1ea7u ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu ch\u01b0a \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u00e1p \u1ee9ng t\u1eeb tr\u01b0\u1edbc hi\u1ec7n l\u00ean nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t c\u01a1n ho\u1ea3ng. <strong>\u0110\u1ecdc theo Crocker v\u00e0 Wolfe:<\/strong> gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb c\u1ee7a Lan \u0111ang b\u1ecb treo v\u00e0o m\u1ed9t bi\u1ebfn s\u1ed1 c\u00f4 kh\u00f4ng \u0111i\u1ec1u khi\u1ec3n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c, l\u00e0 ng\u00f3n tay g\u00f5 ph\u00edm c\u1ee7a m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng l\u1ea1.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='bo-roi' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 th\u1ee9 hai: L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i (ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ec9 bi\u1ebft v\u1ecdng l\u1ea1i)<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u00e2u h\u1ecfi ng\u1ea7m:<\/strong> \u201cN\u1ebfu m\u00ecnh n\u00f3i \u2018Kh\u00f4ng\u2019, ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u1ea5y c\u00f3 b\u1ecf \u0111i kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u1ede \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e0y, c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 b\u1ecb bi\u1ebfn th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t kho\u1ea3n ph\u00ed duy tr\u00ec, \u0111em ra \u0111\u00f3ng \u0111\u1ecbnh k\u1ef3 \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef ch\u1ed7 trong \u0111\u1eddi m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi. Nh\u01b0 Echo kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd d\u00e1m m\u1edf l\u1eddi tr\u01b0\u1edbc, ng\u01b0\u1eddi mang \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e0y m\u1ea5t quy\u1ec1n n\u00f3i \u201cKh\u00f4ng\u201d, ch\u1ec9 c\u00f2n bi\u1ebft n\u00f3i \u201cV\u00e2ng\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u01a1 ch\u1ebf t\u00e2m l\u00fd.<\/strong> Theo Schema Therapy, Young et al. (2003) m\u00f4 t\u1ea3 s\u1ef1 k\u1ebft h\u1ee3p gi\u1eefa l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i (abandonment) v\u00e0 s\u1ef1 khu\u1ea5t ph\u1ee5c hay nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 (subjugation): tin r\u1eb1ng nh\u1eefng ng\u01b0\u1eddi quan tr\u1ecdng r\u1ed3i s\u1ebd r\u1eddi \u0111i, n\u00ean s\u1eb5n s\u00e0ng \u0111\u1eb7t nhu c\u1ea7u c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh xu\u1ed1ng sau \u0111\u1ec3 n\u00edu k\u00e9o.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">D\u01b0\u1edbi l\u0103ng k\u00ednh thuy\u1ebft g\u1eafn b\u00f3, Mikulincer v\u00e0 Shaver (2007) gi\u1ea3i th\u00edch b\u1eb1ng c\u01a1 ch\u1ebf k\u00edch ho\u1ea1t qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c (hyperactivation): h\u1ec7 th\u1ed1ng g\u1eafn b\u00f3 lo \u00e2u li\u00ean t\u1ee5c r\u00e0 qu\u00e9t m\u1ed1i \u0111e d\u1ecda. M\u1ed9t bi\u1ec3u hi\u1ec7n \u1edf m\u1eb7t h\u00e0nh vi l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c (sexual compliance; Impett &amp; Peplau, 2003), t\u1ee9c \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd khi b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n kh\u00f4ng th\u1eadt s\u1ef1 mu\u1ed1n, th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh xung \u0111\u1ed9t ho\u1eb7c gi\u1eef quan h\u1ec7.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u00e1i gi\u00e1 ph\u1ea3i tr\u1ea3.<\/strong> \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 ph\u1ea7n c\u00f3 b\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng th\u1ef1c nghi\u1ec7m r\u00f5 nh\u1ea5t, nh\u01b0ng v\u1eabn l\u00e0 b\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng t\u01b0\u01a1ng quan. Impett et al. (2005, 2008) v\u00e0 Muise et al. (2013) cho th\u1ea5y \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh \u0111i c\u00f9ng c\u1ea3m x\u00fac ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c, ham mu\u1ed1n suy gi\u1ea3m theo th\u1eddi gian v\u00e0 m\u1ee9c h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng th\u1ea5p h\u01a1n. N\u00f3i g\u1ecdn: tr\u1ea3 ph\u00ed b\u1eb1ng c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef ng\u01b0\u1eddi, th\u00ec th\u1ee9 ta m\u1ea5t tr\u01b0\u1edbc ti\u00ean l\u00e0 ham mu\u1ed1n, t\u1ee9c th\u1ee9 l\u00e0m cho m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 \u0111\u00e1ng gi\u1eef. S\u1ef1 nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 k\u00e9o d\u00e0i c\u00f2n th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111i k\u00e8m o\u00e1n gi\u1eadn \u00e2m th\u1ea7m, hay b\u00f9ng n\u1ed5 \u1edf nh\u1eefng cu\u1ed9c c\u00e3i v\u00e3 t\u01b0\u1edfng nh\u01b0 kh\u00f4ng li\u00ean quan \u0111\u1ebfn chuy\u1ec7n gi\u01b0\u1eddng chi\u1ebfu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Nh\u1eadn di\u1ec7n qua ba th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list dvbt-list'>\n<li><strong>Tr\u01b0\u1edbc:<\/strong> c\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c n\u1eb7ng nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t ngh\u0129a v\u1ee5 (\u201cth\u00f4i, r\u00e1ng chi\u1ec1u anh\/ch\u1ecb \u1ea5y cho y\u00ean chuy\u1ec7n\u201d).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Trong:<\/strong> c\u0103ng m\u1eaft quan s\u00e1t t\u00edn hi\u1ec7u h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh thay v\u00ec c\u1ea3m nh\u1eadn c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh. N\u00f3i \u201c\u1ed5n\u201d khi kh\u00f4ng \u1ed5n; \u0111\u00f4i khi t\u00e1ch r\u1eddi kh\u1ecfi c\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c c\u1ee7a ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sau:<\/strong> nh\u1eb9 nh\u00f5m ki\u1ec3u \u201cmay qu\u00e1, xong r\u1ed3i\u201d ch\u1ee9 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac, k\u00e8m m\u1ed9t kho\u1ea3ng tr\u1ed1ng v\u00e0 ch\u00fat gi\u1eadn m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft gi\u1eadn ai.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-tradeoff has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0110\u01b0\u1ee3c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tr\u00e1nh \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c m\u1ed9t cu\u1ed9c xung \u0111\u1ed9t tr\u01b0\u1edbc m\u1eaft, v\u00e0 m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c gi\u1eef th\u00eam m\u1ed9t th\u1eddi gian.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">M\u1ea5t<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ham mu\u1ed1n c\u1ee7a ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh teo d\u1ea7n, quy\u1ec1n t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i (\u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n \u0111\u1ec3 m\u1ecdi s\u1ef1 \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd c\u00f3 ngh\u0129a) c\u0169ng m\u1ea5t theo, v\u00e0 ta kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd bi\u1ebft ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia \u1edf l\u1ea1i v\u00ec ta hay v\u00ec ta lu\u00f4n n\u00f3i \u201cV\u00e2ng\u201d.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-counterpoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u1ea3n bi\u1ec7n: \u201cNh\u01b0\u1eddng nh\u1ecbn b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh l\u00e0 chuy\u1ec7n b\u00ecnh th\u01b0\u1eddng c\u1ee7a c\u00e1c c\u1eb7p \u0111\u00f4i l\u00e2u n\u0103m. Ch\u1eb3ng l\u1ebd l\u00fac n\u00e0o c\u0169ng ph\u1ea3i th\u1eadt s\u1ef1 mu\u1ed1n m\u1edbi \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u00e0m?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0110\u00fang m\u1ed9t n\u1eeda. Basson (2000) ch\u1ec9 ra r\u1eb1ng ham mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u00e1p \u1ee9ng (responsive desire) l\u00e0 ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n b\u00ecnh th\u01b0\u1eddng: nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi, nh\u1ea5t l\u00e0 trong quan h\u1ec7 d\u00e0i h\u1ea1n, kh\u00f4ng b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u t\u1eeb r\u1ea1o r\u1ef1c t\u1ef1 ph\u00e1t m\u00e0 t\u1eeb vi\u1ec7c ch\u1ecdn g\u1ea7n g\u0169i, r\u1ed3i ham mu\u1ed1n tr\u1ed7i d\u1eady qua k\u00edch th\u00edch. \u0110i\u1ec3m ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t l\u00e0 l\u00fd do b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u: ch\u1ecdn g\u1ea7n g\u0169i d\u00f9 ch\u01b0a c\u00f3 h\u1ee9ng l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn; chi\u1ec1u theo v\u00ec s\u1ee3 \u0111\u1ed1i ph\u01b0\u01a1ng gi\u1eadn l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh. T\u1eeb b\u00ean ngo\u00e0i hai vi\u1ec7c n\u00e0y gi\u1ed1ng h\u1ec7t nhau, nh\u01b0ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi trong cu\u1ed9c bi\u1ebft ngay qua c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi: \u201cN\u1ebfu h\u00f4m nay m\u00ecnh t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i, m\u00ecnh c\u00f3 an to\u00e0n kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-example-box has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V\u00ed d\u1ee5 nh\u1eadp vai \u00b7 Khung l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i v\u00e0 k\u00edch ho\u1ea1t qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Minh (31 tu\u1ed5i) l\u1edbn l\u00ean v\u1edbi ng\u01b0\u1eddi cha th\u01b0\u1eddng b\u1ecf \u0111i nhi\u1ec1u tu\u1ea7n m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng b\u00e1o tr\u01b0\u1edbc. Trong m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 hi\u1ec7n t\u1ea1i, m\u1ed7i khi b\u1ea1n g\u00e1i h\u01a1i xa c\u00e1ch, Minh ch\u1ee7 \u0111\u1ed9ng g\u1ee3i chuy\u1ec7n g\u1ea7n g\u0169i, k\u1ec3 c\u1ea3 khi anh m\u1ec7t ho\u1eb7c kh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n. B\u1ec1 ngo\u00e0i \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi b\u1ea1n trai \u201cnhi\u1ec7t t\u00ecnh\u201d. B\u00ean trong, c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi th\u1eadt l\u00e0: \u201cN\u1ebfu m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m g\u00ec, c\u00f4 \u1ea5y c\u00f3 \u0111i kh\u00f4ng?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>\u0110\u1ecdc theo Young et al.:<\/strong> l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c k\u00edch ho\u1ea1t, v\u00e0 chi\u1ebfn l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ec1n b\u00f9 l\u00e0 d\u00f9ng th\u00e2n m\u1eadt \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef ng\u01b0\u1eddi. <strong>\u0110\u1ecdc theo Mikulincer v\u00e0 Shaver:<\/strong> h\u1ec7 th\u1ed1ng g\u1eafn b\u00f3 k\u00edch ho\u1ea1t qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c, n\u00ean m\u1ecdi kho\u1ea3ng c\u00e1ch \u0111\u1ec1u b\u1ecb \u0111\u1ecdc nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t \u0111e d\u1ecda. <strong>H\u1ec7 qu\u1ea3 theo Impett et al.:<\/strong> ham mu\u1ed1n th\u1eadt c\u1ee7a Minh c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 gi\u1ea3m d\u1ea7n, v\u00e0 b\u1ea1n g\u00e1i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec1u g\u00ec \u201ckh\u00f4ng th\u1eadt\u201d trong nh\u1eefng l\u1ea7n g\u1ea7n g\u0169i.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-safety has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u01b0u \u00fd quan tr\u1ecdng<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">N\u1ebfu vi\u1ec7c n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d b\u1ecb \u0111\u00e1p l\u1ea1i b\u1eb1ng \u0111e d\u1ecda chia tay, tr\u1eebng ph\u1ea1t ho\u1eb7c \u00e9p bu\u1ed9c, th\u00ec \u0111\u00f3 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n l\u00e0 chuy\u1ec7n \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n. \u0110\u00f3 l\u00e0 v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 v\u1ec1 quy\u1ec1n t\u1ef1 quy\u1ebft tr\u00ean c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 v\u00e0 s\u1ef1 an to\u00e0n trong quan h\u1ec7, v\u00e0 c\u1ea7n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c nh\u00ecn nh\u1eadn \u0111\u00fang nh\u01b0 v\u1eady.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='ket-noi' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 th\u1ee9 ba: L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i (ng\u01b0\u1eddi nh\u00ecn th\u1ea5y nhau)<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u00e2u h\u1ecfi ng\u1ea7m:<\/strong> \u201cM\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n ng\u01b0\u1eddi n\u00e0y, v\u00e0 m\u00ecnh t\u00f2 m\u00f2 xem h\u1ecd c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">S\u1ef1 d\u1ecbch chuy\u1ec3n \u1edf \u0111\u00e2y l\u00e0 c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i: b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n l\u00e0 c\u00f4ng c\u1ee5 gi\u1ea3i quy\u1ebft n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3, m\u00e0 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c tr\u1ea3 l\u1ea1i l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t con ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u1ed9c l\u1eadp v\u1edbi \u00fd ch\u00ed ri\u00eang. H\u1ecd c\u00f3 quy\u1ec1n m\u1ec7t, c\u00f3 quy\u1ec1n t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i, v\u00e0 \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3 kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb \u0111\u1ecdc nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t s\u1ef1 x\u00fac ph\u1ea1m hay m\u1ed9t l\u1eddi \u0111e d\u1ecda chia ly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u01a1 ch\u1ebf t\u00e2m l\u00fd.<\/strong> S\u1ef1 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i n\u00e0y \u0111\u00e2m ch\u1ed3i tr\u00ean m\u1ea3nh \u0111\u1ea5t c\u1ee7a ph\u00e2n h\u00f3a b\u1ea3n ng\u00e3, kh\u00e1i ni\u1ec7m c\u1ee7a Murray Bowen (Kerr &amp; Bowen, 1988) m\u00e0 Schnarch (1997) \u1ee9ng d\u1ee5ng v\u00e0o t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-concept-box has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><a href='https:\/\/docvibanthan.com\/?page_id=823'>Kh\u00e1i ni\u1ec7m<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u00e2n h\u00f3a b\u1ea3n ng\u00e3 (Differentiation of self)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng \u1edf s\u00e1t c\u1ea1nh ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb h\u00f2a tan: ch\u1ecbu \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1eddi t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng v\u1ee1 v\u1ee5n, n\u00f3i \u201cKh\u00f4ng\u201d m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng s\u1ee3 m\u1ea5t ng\u01b0\u1eddi, v\u00e0 n\u00f3i \u201cC\u00f3\u201d v\u00ec m\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n. K\u1ebft n\u1ed1i \u0111\u00f2i h\u1ecfi hai ng\u01b0\u1eddi ri\u00eang bi\u1ec7t g\u1eb7p nhau, ch\u1ee9 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i hai ng\u01b0\u1eddi d\u00ednh ch\u1eb7t v\u00e0o nhau \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1ed3n t\u1ea1i.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Nh\u1eadn di\u1ec7n qua ba th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list dvbt-list'>\n<li><strong>Tr\u01b0\u1edbc:<\/strong> h\u00e1o h\u1ee9c ho\u1eb7c t\u0129nh l\u1eb7ng. \u201c\u0110\u1ec3 h\u00f4m kh\u00e1c nh\u00e9\u201d \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u00f3n nh\u1eadn b\u00ecnh th\u1ea3n.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Trong:<\/strong> ch\u00fa \u00fd ch\u1ea3y nh\u1ecbp nh\u00e0ng gi\u1eefa c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia. C\u00f3 th\u1ec3 n\u00f3i \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u00ecnh th\u00edch ho\u1eb7c kh\u00f4ng th\u00edch; ti\u1ebfng c\u01b0\u1eddi hay ch\u00fat ng\u01b0\u1ee3ng ng\u00f9ng kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m h\u1ecfng cu\u1ed9c g\u1eb7p.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sau:<\/strong> \u1ea5m \u00e1p, th\u1ea5y g\u1ea7n h\u01a1n, kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 nhu c\u1ea7u ki\u1ec3m tra \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i hay d\u00f2 x\u00e9t th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-tradeoff has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u0110\u01b0\u1ee3c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ham mu\u1ed1n b\u1ec1n h\u01a1n theo th\u1eddi gian (Impett et al., 2008). S\u1ef1 \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd mang s\u1ee9c n\u1eb7ng th\u1eadt, v\u00ec t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i l\u00e0 \u0111i\u1ec1u an to\u00e0n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">M\u1ea5t<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ta ph\u1ea3i ch\u1ecbu r\u1ee7i ro th\u1eadt c\u1ee7a m\u1ed9t m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 l\u1edbp v\u1ecf b\u1ecdc: ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 kh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n, ho\u1eb7c r\u1eddi \u0111i. Ta c\u0169ng ph\u1ea3i \u0111\u1ed1i di\u1ec7n th\u1eb3ng v\u1edbi kh\u00e1c bi\u1ec7t v\u1ec1 nh\u1ecbp \u0111\u1ed9 v\u00e0 s\u1edf th\u00edch, thay v\u00ec v\u00e1 m\u1ecdi l\u1ed7 h\u1ed5ng b\u1eb1ng s\u1ef1 ch\u1ecbu \u0111\u1ef1ng.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-counterpoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u1ea3n bi\u1ec7n: \u201cN\u00f3i \u2018k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i\u2019 th\u00ec hay, nh\u01b0ng ch\u1eb3ng l\u1ebd c\u1ee9 ph\u1ea3i s\u00e2u s\u1eafc m\u1edbi \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh? C\u00f2n kho\u00e1i c\u1ea3m thu\u1ea7n t\u00fay, c\u00f2n vui ch\u01a1i th\u00ec sao?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ch\u00ednh \u0111\u00e1ng. Kho\u00e1i c\u1ea3m thu\u1ea7n t\u00fay kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i k\u1ebb th\u00f9; Cooper et al. (1998) c\u0169ng t\u00e1ch ri\u00eang \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 t\u0103ng c\u01b0\u1eddng kho\u00e1i c\u1ea3m, v\u00e0 b\u00e0i n\u00e0y kh\u00f4ng x\u1ebfp h\u1ea1ng cao th\u1ea5p. \u0110i\u1ec1u c\u1ea7n soi l\u00e0 c\u00e1i ta gi\u1ea5u d\u01b0\u1edbi nh\u00e3n \u201cvui th\u00f4i\u201d: n\u1ebfu sau \u0111\u00f3 ta ph\u1ea3i ki\u1ec3m tra \u0111i\u1ec7n tho\u1ea1i ba l\u1ea7n xem ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia c\u00f2n mu\u1ed1n m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng, \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 th\u1eadt kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 vui. Ng\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ea1i, \u201ck\u1ebft n\u1ed1i\u201d c\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t nh\u00e3n d\u00e1n \u0111\u1eb9p che cho x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn hay n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf. C\u00e1ch ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t kh\u00f4ng n\u1eb1m \u1edf l\u1eddi ta t\u1ef1 n\u00f3i, m\u00e0 \u1edf ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng c\u1ee7a ta khi ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='ba-dong-co' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Ba \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 c\u1ea1nh nhau, v\u00e0 v\u00ec sao kh\u00f4ng ai thu\u1ea7n m\u1ed9t lo\u1ea1i<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<figure class='wp-block-table dvbt-table'><table><thead><tr><th>Ti\u00eau ch\u00ed<\/th><th>X\u00e1c nh\u1eadn (Narcissus)<\/th><th>Tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i (Echo)<\/th><th>K\u1ebft n\u1ed1i<\/th><\/tr><\/thead><tbody><tr><td>B\u1ea3n ch\u1ea5t<\/td><td>T\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng<\/td><td>Kho\u1ea3n ph\u00ed tr\u1ea3 tr\u01b0\u1edbc<\/td><td>C\u00e2y c\u1ea7u<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>N\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i<\/td><td>\u201cM\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u1ee7 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb\u201d<\/td><td>\u201cM\u00ecnh s\u1ebd b\u1ecb b\u1ecf l\u1ea1i\u201d<\/td><td>R\u1ee7i ro b\u00ecnh th\u01b0\u1eddng c\u1ee7a s\u1ef1 g\u1ea7n g\u0169i th\u1eadt<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>C\u01a1 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u00f3ng vai tr\u00f2<\/td><td>B\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng ch\u1ee9ng minh s\u1ee9c h\u00fat<\/td><td>Ph\u01b0\u01a1ng ti\u1ec7n thanh to\u00e1n \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef ng\u01b0\u1eddi<\/td><td>Ph\u01b0\u01a1ng ti\u1ec7n giao ti\u1ebfp c\u1ee7a c\u1ea3 hai<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Nh\u00ecn nh\u1eadn b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh<\/td><td>Chi\u1ebfc g\u01b0\u01a1ng ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu<\/td><td>Ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ea3i gi\u1eef l\u1ea1i<\/td><td>M\u1ed9t c\u00e1 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ed9c l\u1eadp c\u00f3 \u00fd mu\u1ed1n ri\u00eang<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Khi b\u1ecb t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i<\/td><td>Gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n nh\u01b0 s\u1ee5p \u0111\u1ed5<\/td><td>Ho\u1ea3ng lo\u1ea1n v\u00ec b\u00e1o hi\u1ec7u chia ly<\/td><td>Ghi nh\u1eadn th\u00f4ng tin, k\u00e8m ch\u00fat ti\u1ebfc<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>C\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c sau \u0111\u00f3<\/td><td>Th\u1ecfa m\u00e3n nh\u1ea5t th\u1eddi, c\u1ea7n n\u1ea1p l\u1ea1i li\u00ean t\u1ee5c<\/td><td>Nh\u1eb9 nh\u00f5m v\u00ec \u201ctho\u00e1t n\u1ea1n\u201d, k\u00e8m tr\u1ed1ng r\u1ed7ng<\/td><td>\u1ea4m \u00e1p, tr\u1ecdn v\u1eb9n, kh\u00f4ng c\u1ea7n d\u00f2 x\u00e9t<\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Khung l\u00fd thuy\u1ebft n\u1ec1n<\/td><td>Nhu c\u1ea7u ph\u1ea3n chi\u1ebfu (Kohut), l\u00f2ng t\u1ef1 tr\u1ecdng c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n (Crocker &amp; Wolfe)<\/td><td>L\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i v\u00e0 nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 (Young et al.), lo \u00e2u g\u1eafn b\u00f3<\/td><td>Ph\u00e2n h\u00f3a b\u1ea3n ng\u00e3 (Schnarch; Kerr &amp; Bowen), ham mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u00e1p \u1ee9ng (Basson)<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">R\u1ea5t hi\u1ebfm ai mang m\u1ed9t \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 tinh khi\u1ebft. Ta c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i v\u00e0o m\u1ed9t t\u1ed1i th\u1ee9 B\u1ea3y th\u1ea3nh th\u01a1i, nh\u01b0ng l\u00e0m t\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i v\u00e0o tu\u1ea7n nghe tin b\u1ea1n t\u00ecnh \u0111ang c\u1ea3m n\u1eafng ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c. \u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 \u0111\u1ed5i theo m\u1ee9c c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng v\u00e0 giai \u0111o\u1ea1n c\u1ee7a m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Gi\u1ea3 thuy\u1ebft c\u1ee7a b\u00e0i n\u00e0y, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i k\u1ebft lu\u1eadn c\u1ee7a m\u1ed9t nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u c\u1ee5 th\u1ec3:<\/strong> khi m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u1ea7n t\u1ea5m g\u01b0\u01a1ng v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia s\u1ee3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, hai nhu c\u1ea7u c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 kh\u1edbp nhau m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch \u0111\u00e1ng ng\u1edd. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi th\u1ee9 nh\u1ea5t (Narcissus) nh\u1eadn \u0111\u1ee7 s\u1ef1 ph\u1ee5c t\u00f9ng \u0111\u1ec3 lu\u00f4n th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh l\u00e0 trung t\u00e2m. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi th\u1ee9 hai (Echo) nh\u1eadn \u0111\u1ee7 s\u1ef1 k\u1ec1 c\u1eadn \u0111\u1ec3 xoa d\u1ecbu n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 c\u00f4 \u0111\u01a1n. H\u1ecd c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c khen l\u00e0 c\u1eb7p \u0111\u00f4i \u201ctr\u1eddi sinh\u201d trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m, cho \u0111\u1ebfn khi ham mu\u1ed1n c\u1ea1n ki\u1ec7t v\u00e0 o\u00e1n gi\u1eadn \u0111\u1eadp v\u1ee1 l\u1edbp v\u1ecf b\u1ecdc. S\u1ef1 b\u00ecnh y\u00ean \u1ea5y kh\u00f4ng h\u1eb3n l\u00e0 h\u00f2a h\u1ee3p; n\u00f3 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t b\u1ea3n h\u1ee3p \u0111\u1ed3ng ng\u1ea7m, tr\u1ea3 gi\u00e1 b\u1eb1ng c\u01a1 h\u1ed9i th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 ch\u1ea1m v\u00e0o nhau. H\u00e3y \u0111\u1ecdc \u0111\u00e2y nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t gi\u1ea3 thuy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1ef1 ki\u1ec3m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-counterpoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ph\u1ea3n bi\u1ec7n: \u201cN\u1ebfu c\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ec1u h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng v\u1edbi th\u1ecfa thu\u1eadn ng\u1ea7m \u0111\u00f3 th\u00ec sao?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00f3 nh\u1eefng c\u1eb7p th\u1eadt s\u1ef1 \u1ed5n v\u1edbi th\u1ecfa thu\u1eadn \u1ea5y trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m. Nh\u01b0ng c\u00e1c nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u v\u1ec1 \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh g\u1ee3i \u00fd r\u1eb1ng ham mu\u1ed1n l\u00e0 th\u1ee9 hao h\u1ee5t \u0111\u1ea7u ti\u00ean (Impett et al., 2008; Muise et al., 2013). N\u1ebfu v\u1edbi h\u1ecd \u201c\u1ed5n\u201d ngh\u0129a l\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n ham mu\u1ed1n nh\u01b0ng v\u1eabn \u1edf b\u00ean nhau, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t l\u1ef1a ch\u1ecdn h\u1ecd c\u00f3 quy\u1ec1n, nh\u01b0ng c\u1ea7n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c g\u1ecdi \u0111\u00fang t\u00ean.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='viet-nam' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>B\u1ed1i c\u1ea3nh Vi\u1ec7t Nam: \u0111\u1ea5t di\u1ec5n cho Echo v\u00e0 s\u00e2n kh\u1ea5u cho Narcissus<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C\u00e1c nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u \u1edf tr\u00ean ch\u1ee7 y\u1ebfu l\u1ea5y m\u1eabu ph\u01b0\u01a1ng T\u00e2y. C\u1ea5u tr\u00fac v\u0103n h\u00f3a c\u1ee7a ta c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng thu\u1eadn l\u1ee3i cho nh\u1eefng \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e0y; d\u01b0\u1edbi \u0111\u00e2y l\u00e0 suy ng\u1eabm c\u00f3 c\u01a1 s\u1edf v\u0103n h\u00f3a, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i s\u1ed1 li\u1ec7u.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>K\u1ecbch b\u1ea3n c\u1ee7a Echo.<\/strong> C\u00e2u \u201cThuy\u1ec1n theo l\u00e1i, g\u00e1i theo ch\u1ed3ng\u201d hay l\u1eddi d\u1ea1y \u201cCh\u1ed3ng gi\u1eadn th\u00ec v\u1ee3 b\u1edbt l\u1eddi \/ C\u01a1m s\u00f4i nh\u1ecf l\u1eeda, m\u1ea5y \u0111\u1eddi c\u01a1m kh\u00ea\u201d \u00e1m th\u1ecb r\u1eb1ng tr\u00e1ch nhi\u1ec7m gi\u1eef m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 n\u1eb1m \u1edf s\u1ef1 nh\u1eabn nh\u1ecbn c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef. Khi nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh th\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111o \u0111\u1ee9c h\u1ea1nh, c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 r\u1ea5t d\u1ec5 b\u1ecb bi\u1ebfn th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng c\u1ee5 n\u00edu gi\u1eef.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>S\u00e2n kh\u1ea5u c\u1ee7a Narcissus.<\/strong> \u1ede chi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ea1i, \u0111\u1ecbnh ki\u1ebfn v\u1ec1 \u201cb\u1ea3n l\u0129nh \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng\u201d khi\u1ebfn nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi coi t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t \u0111\u1ea5u tr\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u1ec3 kh\u1eb3ng \u0111\u1ecbnh v\u1ecb th\u1ebf. T\u1ed5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng khi \u201cth\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i\u201d tr\u00ean gi\u01b0\u1eddng th\u01b0\u1eddng kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ph\u00e9p n\u00f3i ra, bi\u1ebfn m\u1ed7i cu\u1ed9c \u00e2n \u00e1i th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t b\u00e0i ki\u1ec3m tra danh d\u1ef1.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">L\u01b0u \u00fd: \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng c\u0169ng c\u00f3 n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef c\u0169ng khao kh\u00e1t \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn. V\u0103n h\u00f3a ch\u1ec9 l\u00e0m m\u1ed9t s\u1ed1 con \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng d\u1ec5 \u0111i h\u01a1n, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i \u0111\u1ecbnh m\u1ec7nh gi\u1edbi t\u00ednh.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='diem-cot-loi' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-keypoint has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec3m c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list'>\n<li>C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi th\u00e2n m\u1eadt c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ph\u1ee5c v\u1ee5 ba m\u1ee5c \u0111\u00edch kh\u00e1c nhau: \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn, tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i, ho\u1eb7c k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i. \u0110i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00e1ng h\u1ecfi l\u00e0 ch\u1ee9c n\u0103ng, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i t\u1ea7n su\u1ea5t.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>X\u00e1c nh\u1eadn v\u00e0 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i tr\u00f4ng gi\u1ed1ng nhau \u1edf b\u1ec1 m\u1eb7t, nh\u01b0ng kh\u00e1c \u1edf ch\u1ed7 n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 n\u1eb1m \u0111\u00e2u: \u1edf gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n, hay \u1edf s\u1ef1 t\u1ed3n t\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Quan h\u1ec7 v\u00ec n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111i c\u00f9ng ham mu\u1ed1n suy gi\u1ea3m v\u00e0 quan h\u1ec7 k\u00e9m b\u1ec1n; quan h\u1ec7 v\u00ec ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn \u0111i c\u00f9ng ham mu\u1ed1n v\u00e0 h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng b\u1ec1n h\u01a1n. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 b\u1eb1ng ch\u1ee9ng t\u01b0\u01a1ng quan, ch\u1ee7 y\u1ebfu t\u1eeb m\u1eabu ph\u01b0\u01a1ng T\u00e2y.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Ch\u1ecdn g\u1ea7n g\u0169i d\u00f9 ch\u01b0a c\u00f3 h\u1ee9ng (ham mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u00e1p \u1ee9ng) kh\u00e1c v\u1edbi \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd v\u00ec s\u1ee3 h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 khi t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i. C\u00e2u h\u1ecfi ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t: \u201cn\u1ebfu h\u00f4m nay m\u00ecnh t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i, m\u00ecnh c\u00f3 an to\u00e0n kh\u00f4ng?\u201d.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Kh\u00f4ng ai thu\u1ea7n m\u1ed9t lo\u1ea1i; \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 \u0111\u1ed5i theo ho\u00e0n c\u1ea3nh v\u00e0 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 g\u1ecdi t\u00ean, d\u1ecbch chuy\u1ec3n t\u1eebng b\u01b0\u1edbc nh\u1ecf. N\u1ebfu n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d \u0111em l\u1ea1i \u0111e d\u1ecda hay \u00e9p bu\u1ed9c, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 an to\u00e0n, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='thuc-hanh' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Th\u1ef1c h\u00e0nh: t\u1eeb t\u1ef1 soi \u0111\u1ebfn nh\u1eefng d\u1ecbch chuy\u1ec3n nh\u1ecf<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">H\u00e3y ch\u1ecdn m\u1ed9t l\u1ea7n g\u1ea7n g\u0169i g\u1ea7n nh\u1ea5t v\u00e0 ch\u1eadm r\u00e3i t\u1ef1 h\u1ecfi, \u0111\u1eebng tr\u1ea3 l\u1eddi nhanh:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-technique has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading dvbt-toc-skip'>B\u1ed9 c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi t\u1ef1 soi<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list'>\n<li><strong>Tr\u01b0\u1edbc \u00b7 K\u1ef3 v\u1ecdng<\/strong>M\u00ecnh \u0111ang k\u1ef3 v\u1ecdng \u0111i\u1ec1u g\u00ec nh\u1ea5t t\u1eeb cu\u1ed9c g\u1eb7p n\u00e0y? N\u1ebfu n\u00f3 kh\u00f4ng x\u1ea3y ra, m\u00ecnh c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y th\u1ebf n\u00e0o?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Tr\u01b0\u1edbc \u00b7 L\u1eddi t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i<\/strong>N\u1ebfu h\u00f4m nay m\u00ecnh n\u00f3i \u201cm\u00ecnh m\u1ec7t, \u0111\u1ec3 h\u00f4m kh\u00e1c nh\u00e9\u201d, m\u00ecnh mong h\u1ecd ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng ra sao, v\u00e0 m\u00ecnh th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 s\u1ee3 \u0111i\u1ec1u g\u00ec s\u1ebd x\u1ea3y ra?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Trong \u00b7 N\u01a1i ch\u00fa \u00fd<\/strong>Ch\u00fa \u00fd c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh \u0111ang neo \u1edf \u0111\u00e2u: \u1edf c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh, \u1edf c\u1ea3m x\u00fac c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia, hay \u1edf vi\u1ec7c h\u1ecd \u0111ang \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 m\u00ecnh ra sao?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Trong \u00b7 Ranh gi\u1edbi<\/strong>C\u00f3 ranh gi\u1edbi n\u00e0o m\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n v\u1ea1ch ra nh\u01b0ng l\u1ea1i nu\u1ed1t ng\u01b0\u1ee3c v\u00e0o trong?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sau \u00b7 C\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c \u0111\u1ecdng l\u1ea1i<\/strong>\u0110i\u1ec1u \u0111\u1ecdng l\u1ea1i l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 \u1ea5m \u00e1p tr\u1ecdn v\u1eb9n, s\u1ef1 nh\u1eb9 nh\u00f5m v\u00ec tho\u00e1t n\u1ea1n, hay n\u1ed7i b\u1ed3n ch\u1ed3n \u0111\u00f2i \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c kh\u1eb3ng \u0111\u1ecbnh th\u00eam?<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Sau \u00b7 Khi ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia im l\u1eb7ng<\/strong>N\u1ebfu h\u00f4m sau ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia b\u1eadn v\u00e0 im l\u1eb7ng c\u1ea3 ng\u00e0y, c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng ra sao?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>C\u00e1ch \u0111\u1ecdc (g\u1ee3i \u00fd, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i ch\u1ea9n \u0111o\u00e1n).<\/strong> N\u1ebfu c\u00e2u tr\u1ea3 l\u1eddi xoay quanh \u201cm\u00ecnh c\u00f3 \u0111\u1ee7 quy\u1ebfn r\u0169 kh\u00f4ng\u201d, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 b\u00f3ng d\u00e1ng Narcissus. N\u1ebfu xoay quanh \u201cng\u01b0\u1eddi ta c\u00f3 r\u1eddi \u0111i kh\u00f4ng\u201d, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 b\u00f3ng d\u00e1ng Echo. N\u1ebfu l\u00e0 \u201cm\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n ng\u01b0\u1eddi n\u00e0y\u201d v\u00e0 th\u1ea5t v\u1ecdng c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m m\u00ecnh s\u1ee5p \u0111\u1ed5, \u0111\u00f3 g\u1ea7n v\u1edbi k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i. C\u00e2u tr\u1ea3 l\u1eddi m\u01a1 h\u1ed3 c\u0169ng l\u00e0 d\u1eef li\u1ec7u: c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ta ch\u01b0a quen h\u1ecfi m\u00ecnh nh\u1eefng c\u00e2u n\u00e0y.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ta kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 b\u1ebb g\u00e3y m\u1ed9t l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 \u0103n s\u00e2u b\u1eb1ng m\u1ed9t c\u00e2u h\u00f4 h\u00e0o quy\u1ebft t\u00e2m. D\u01b0\u1edbi \u0111\u00e2y l\u00e0 nh\u1eefng b\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111i nh\u1ecf \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ed5i h\u01b0\u1edbng:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-technique has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading dvbt-toc-skip'>N\u0103m d\u1ecbch chuy\u1ec3n nh\u1ecf<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list'>\n<li><strong>G\u1ecdi t\u00ean \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi h\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ed9ng<\/strong>\u0110\u1eebng v\u1ed9i h\u1ecfi \u201cc\u00f3 n\u00ean l\u00e0m kh\u00f4ng\u201d, h\u00e3y h\u1ecfi \u201cm\u00ecnh \u0111ang c\u1ed1 xoa d\u1ecbu n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 n\u00e0o\u201d. Ch\u1ec9 ri\u00eang vi\u1ec7c g\u1ecdi t\u00ean \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0m gi\u1ea3m l\u1ef1c k\u00e9o c\u1ee7a ph\u1ea3n x\u1ea1.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>T\u1eadp quy\u1ec1n t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i \u1edf v\u00f9ng an to\u00e0n<\/strong>Ng\u01b0\u1eddi quen n\u00f3i \u201cc\u00f3\u201d tr\u00ean gi\u01b0\u1eddng th\u01b0\u1eddng ch\u01b0a t\u1eebng t\u1eadp n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d \u1edf \u0111\u00e2u an to\u00e0n. H\u00e3y b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u t\u1eeb vi\u1ec7c nh\u1ecf: ch\u1ecdn m\u00f3n m\u00ecnh th\u00edch, t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i m\u1ed9t l\u1eddi nh\u1edd v\u1ea3 phi l\u00fd. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 c\u00e1ch x\u00e2y n\u1ec1n ph\u00e2n h\u00f3a b\u1ea3n ng\u00e3 (Schnarch, 1997).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>C\u1eaft s\u1ee3i d\u00e2y n\u1ed1i gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n v\u1edbi ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kia<\/strong>D\u1ea5u hi\u1ec7u ti\u1ebfn b\u1ed9 kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 th\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c khao kh\u00e1t, m\u00e0 l\u00e0 khi b\u1ecb t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i, ta ch\u1ec9 bu\u1ed3n m\u1ed9t t\u1ed1i thay v\u00ec th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh l\u00e0 k\u1ebb b\u1ecf \u0111i.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>T\u00e1i \u0111\u1ecbnh h\u01b0\u1edbng s\u1ef1 ch\u00fa \u00fd<\/strong>Thay v\u00ec l\u1ea9m nh\u1ea9m \u201cl\u00e0m sao \u0111\u1ec3 h\u1ecd kh\u00f4ng th\u1ea5t v\u1ecdng\u201d, h\u00e3y h\u1ecfi \u201ch\u00f4m nay m\u00ecnh mu\u1ed1n g\u1ea7n h\u1ecd theo c\u00e1ch n\u00e0o\u201d. N\u1ebfu c\u00e2u tr\u1ea3 l\u1eddi l\u00e0 \u201ckh\u00f4ng mu\u1ed1n g\u00ec c\u1ea3\u201d, h\u00e3y t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng t\u00edn hi\u1ec7u \u0111\u00f3.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>X\u00e2y s\u1ef1 th\u00e2n m\u1eadt kh\u00f4ng-t\u00ecnh-d\u1ee5c<\/strong>\u00d4m, n\u1eafm tay, tr\u00f2 chuy\u1ec7n s\u00e2u. Khi t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i g\u00e1nh v\u00e1c vai tr\u00f2 k\u00eanh duy nh\u1ea5t \u0111\u1ec3 ch\u1ee9ng minh hay gi\u1eef ch\u00e2n, n\u00f3 m\u1edbi c\u00f3 c\u01a1 h\u1ed9i quay v\u1ec1 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t l\u1ef1a ch\u1ecdn t\u1ef1 nguy\u1ec7n.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Khi n\u00e0o c\u1ea7n ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u1ed3ng h\u00e0nh chuy\u00ean m\u00f4n.<\/strong> N\u1ebfu m\u1eabu h\u00ecnh n\u00e0y l\u1eb7p l\u1ea1i qua nhi\u1ec1u m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7, g\u1eafn v\u1edbi t\u1ed5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng g\u1eafn b\u00f3 ho\u1eb7c ch\u1ea5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng, ho\u1eb7c n\u1ebfu n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d trong m\u1ed1i quan h\u1ec7 hi\u1ec7n t\u1ea1i \u0111em l\u1ea1i h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 \u0111\u00e1ng s\u1ee3, \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 l\u00fac c\u00e2n nh\u1eafc tr\u1ecb li\u1ec7u (nh\u01b0 li\u1ec7u ph\u00e1p l\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ed3 hay tr\u1ecb li\u1ec7u t\u1eadp trung v\u00e0o g\u1eafn b\u00f3) v\u00e0 t\u00ecm s\u1ef1 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 an to\u00e0n. M\u1ed9t b\u00e0i vi\u1ebft kh\u00f4ng thay \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='gioi-han' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Nh\u1eefng gi\u1edbi h\u1ea1n c\u1ea7n ghi nh\u1eadn<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list dvbt-list'>\n<li><strong>T\u01b0\u01a1ng quan ch\u01b0a h\u1eb3n l\u00e0 nh\u00e2n qu\u1ea3.<\/strong> \u0110\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 n\u00e9 tr\u00e1nh \u0111i k\u00e8m ham mu\u1ed1n th\u1ea5p, nh\u01b0ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ch\u00ednh m\u1ed9t n\u1ec1n t\u1ea3ng quan h\u1ec7 thi\u1ebfu an to\u00e0n m\u1edbi sinh ra c\u1ea3 hai.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>M\u1eabu nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u h\u1eb9p.<\/strong> C\u00e1c l\u00fd thuy\u1ebft ph\u1ea7n l\u1edbn d\u1ef1a tr\u00ean nh\u00f3m nh\u00e2n kh\u1ea9u h\u1ecdc ph\u01b0\u01a1ng T\u00e2y (WEIRD), th\u01b0\u1eddng l\u00e0 sinh vi\u00ean v\u00e0 c\u00e1c c\u1eb7p \u0111\u00f4i tr\u1ebb. C\u1ea7n th\u1eadn tr\u1ecdng khi \u00e1p d\u1ee5ng c\u1ee9ng nh\u1eafc v\u00e0o b\u1ed1i c\u1ea3nh Vi\u1ec7t Nam.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Ba nh\u00e3n l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t s\u1ef1 \u0111\u01a1n gi\u1ea3n h\u00f3a.<\/strong> Ch\u00fang l\u00e0 b\u1ea3n \u0111\u1ed3 \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1ef1 soi, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i c\u00f4ng c\u1ee5 ch\u1ea9n \u0111o\u00e1n ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c, v\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng bao qu\u00e1t m\u1ecdi \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u01a1 (kho\u00e1i c\u1ea3m, t\u00f2 m\u00f2, th\u00f3i quen&#8230;).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00fac n\u00e0o c\u0169ng c\u1ea7n ph\u00e2n t\u00edch s\u00e2u xa.<\/strong> \u0110\u00f4i khi m\u1ed9t cu\u1ed9c \u00e2n \u00e1i ch\u1ec9 \u0111\u01a1n gi\u1ea3n l\u00e0 v\u00ec ni\u1ec1m vui thu\u1ea7n t\u00fay. \u0110\u1eebng bi\u1ebfn ph\u00f2ng ng\u1ee7 th\u00e0nh ph\u00f2ng kh\u00e1m t\u00e2m l\u00fd.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='chiec-ho' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Tr\u1edf l\u1ea1i chi\u1ebfc h\u1ed3<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tr\u1edf l\u1ea1i v\u1edbi th\u1ea7n tho\u1ea1i: Narcissus t\u00e0n l\u1ee5i b\u00ean h\u1ed3 n\u01b0\u1edbc, Echo tan bi\u1ebfn th\u00e0nh \u00e2m thanh h\u01b0 \u1ea3o. H\u1ecd \u0111i \u0111\u1ebfn t\u1eadn c\u00f9ng c\u1ee7a s\u1ef1 tr\u1eebng ph\u1ea1t: \u1edf s\u00e1t c\u1ea1nh m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi, nh\u01b0ng ch\u1ecbu chung s\u1ed1 ph\u1eadn c\u00f4 \u0111\u1ed9c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nh\u01b0ng trong \u0111\u1eddi th\u1ef1c, ta c\u00f3 m\u1ed9t quy\u1ec1n n\u0103ng m\u00e0 Ovid kh\u00f4ng trao cho nh\u00e2n v\u1eadt c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh: quy\u1ec1n r\u1eddi m\u1eaft kh\u1ecfi m\u1eb7t n\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111\u1ec3 nh\u00ecn th\u1eb3ng v\u00e0o ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u1ed1i di\u1ec7n, v\u00e0 quy\u1ec1n c\u1ea5t l\u00ean m\u1ed9t gi\u1ecdng n\u00f3i nguy\u00ean b\u1ea3n thay v\u00ec nh\u1ea1i l\u1ea1i ti\u1ebfng ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">D\u00f9ng t\u00ecnh d\u1ee5c \u0111\u1ec3 t\u00ecm s\u1ef1 x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn l\u00e0 ta \u0111ang xin m\u1ed9t t\u1edd gi\u1ea5y ch\u1ee9ng nh\u1eadn. D\u00f9ng c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh b\u1ecb b\u1ecf r\u01a1i l\u00e0 ta \u0111ang c\u1eafn r\u0103ng \u0111\u00f3ng m\u1ed9t kho\u1ea3n ph\u00ed duy tr\u00ec. C\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ec1u l\u00e0 n\u1ed7 l\u1ef1c tuy\u1ec7t v\u1ecdng \u0111\u1ec3 t\u1ef1 b\u1ea3o v\u1ec7 tr\u01b0\u1edbc m\u1ed9t n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 c\u00f3 th\u1eadt. Nh\u01b0ng chi\u1ebfc gi\u01b0\u1eddng kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 ph\u00f2ng thi \u0111\u1ec3 ch\u1ea5m \u0111i\u1ec3m, c\u0169ng ch\u1eb3ng ph\u1ea3i qu\u1ea7y thu ng\u00e2n \u0111\u1ec3 thanh to\u00e1n. N\u00f3 ch\u1ec9 th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh kh\u00f4ng gian c\u1ee7a s\u1ef1 g\u1eafn k\u1ebft khi c\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ee7 can \u0111\u1ea3m \u0111\u1ec3 n\u00f3i \u201cKh\u00f4ng\u201d m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng s\u1ee3 m\u1ea5t nhau. B\u1edfi ch\u1ec9 khi quy\u1ec1n t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c b\u1ea3o v\u1ec7 an to\u00e0n, ch\u1eef \u201cC\u00f3\u201d th\u1ed1t ra m\u1edbi mang tr\u1ecdn \u00fd ngh\u0129a c\u1ee7a t\u00ecnh y\u00eau.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div id='nguon' class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-section has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-sources has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<h2 class='wp-block-heading'>Ngu\u1ed3n<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class='wp-block-list'>\n<li>Basson, R. (2000). The female sexual response: A different model. <em>Journal of Sex &amp; Marital Therapy, 26<\/em>(1), 51\u201365.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Cooper, M. L., Shapiro, C. M., &amp; Powers, A. M. (1998). Motivations for sex and risky sexual behavior among adolescents and young adults: A functional perspective. <em>Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75<\/em>(6), 1528\u20131558.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Crocker, J., &amp; Wolfe, C. T. (2001). Contingencies of self-worth. <em>Psychological Review, 108<\/em>(3), 593\u2013623.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Impett, E. A., &amp; Peplau, L. A. (2003). Sexual compliance: Gender, motivational, and relationship perspectives. <em>The Journal of Sex Research, 40<\/em>(1), 87\u2013100.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Impett, E. A., Peplau, L. A., &amp; Gable, S. L. (2005). Approach and avoidance sexual motives: Implications for personal and interpersonal well-being. <em>Personal Relationships, 12<\/em>(4), 465\u2013482. https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1111\/j.1475-6811.2005.00126.x<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Impett, E. A., Strachman, A., Finkel, E. J., &amp; Gable, S. L. (2008). Maintaining sexual desire in intimate relationships: The importance of approach goals. <em>Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 94<\/em>(5), 808\u2013823.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Kerr, M. E., &amp; Bowen, M. (1988). <em>Family evaluation: An approach based on Bowen theory<\/em>. W. W. Norton.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Kohut, H. (1971). <em>The analysis of the self<\/em>. International Universities Press.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Meston, C. M., &amp; Buss, D. M. (2007). Why humans have sex. <em>Archives of Sexual Behavior, 36<\/em>(4), 477\u2013507.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Mikulincer, M., &amp; Shaver, P. R. (2007). <em>Attachment in adulthood: Structure, dynamics, and change<\/em>. Guilford Press.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Muise, A., Impett, E. A., &amp; Desmarais, S. (2013). Getting it on versus getting it over with: Sexual motivation, desire, and satisfaction in intimate bonds. <em>Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 39<\/em>(10), 1320\u20131332.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Ovid. (2008). <em>Metamorphoses<\/em> (A. D. Melville, Trans.). Oxford University Press. (Original work published ca. 8 CE)<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Schnarch, D. (1997). <em>Passionate marriage: Keeping love and intimacy alive in committed relationships<\/em>. W. W. Norton.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Young, J. E., Klosko, J. S., &amp; Weishaar, M. E. (2003). <em>Schema therapy: A practitioner&#8217;s guide<\/em>. Guilford Press.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group dvbt-article-toc has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n<style>.dvbt-toc-list{display:flex;flex-direction:column;gap:0;border:none!important;padding-left:0!important;margin:6px 0 0 0!important}.dvbt-toc-list a{display:block;margin:0!important;padding:3px 0!important;color:#625c65!important;text-decoration:none!important;font-family:Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif!important;font-size:12px!important;font-weight:400!important;line-height:1.3!important;letter-spacing:0!important}.dvbt-toc-list a:hover{color:#321637!important}.dvbt-toc-list a.active{color:#35163c!important;font-weight:700!important}<\/style>\n\n<script>document.addEventListener('DOMContentLoaded',function(){var toc=document.querySelector('.dvbt-toc-list');var hs=document.querySelectorAll('.dvbt-article-main h2:not(.dvbt-toc-skip)');if(!toc||!hs.length){return;}toc.innerHTML='';var items=[];hs.forEach(function(h,i){var s=h.closest('.dvbt-article-section');var id=s?s.id:h.id;if(!id){id='section-'+(i+1);if(s){s.id=id;}else{h.id=id;}}var a=document.createElement('a');a.href='#'+id;a.textContent=h.textContent.trim();toc.appendChild(a);items.push({h:h,a:a});});function upd(){var cur=0;items.forEach(function(it,i){if(it.h.getBoundingClientRect().top<=180){cur=i;}});items.forEach(function(it,i){it.a.classList.toggle('active',i===cur);});}window.addEventListener('scroll',upd,{passive:true});window.addEventListener('resize',upd);upd();});<\/script>\n\n<nav class='dvbt-toc-list' aria-label='M\u1ee5c l\u1ee5c b\u00e0i vi\u1ebft'><\/nav>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<style>.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-table{overflow-x:auto!important;margin:26px 0 32px 0!important}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-table table{width:100%;min-width:560px;border-collapse:collapse;font-size:15px;line-height:1.5}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-table th{background:#f5f2f6;color:#6f2b67;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.04em;text-transform:uppercase;text-align:left;padding:10px 12px;border:0;border-bottom:1px solid #ded9df}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-table td{padding:10px 12px;border:0;border-top:1px solid #ece6ed;vertical-align:top}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-table td:first-child{font-weight:700;color:#211821}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-list{margin:0 0 22px 0!important;padding-left:22px!important}.dvbt-article-body .dvbt-list li{margin:0 0 10px 0!important;font-size:16px;line-height:1.55}.dvbt-safety{margin:28px 0 32px 0!important;padding:14px 18px!important;width:100%!important;box-sizing:border-box!important;background:#fbf4f3!important;border-left:3px solid #b0413e!important}.dvbt-safety>p{margin:0!important;padding:0!important}.dvbt-safety>p:first-child{margin-bottom:6px!important;font-size:13px!important;line-height:1.3!important;font-weight:700!important;text-transform:uppercase!important;letter-spacing:.04em!important;color:#8c2f2b!important}.dvbt-safety>p:last-child{font-size:16px!important;line-height:1.55!important;color:#3d3037!important}<\/style>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t h\u00e0nh vi th\u00e2n m\u1eadt c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 xin x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn, \u0111\u00f3ng ph\u00ed gi\u1eef ng\u01b0\u1eddi, ho\u1eb7c k\u1ebft n\u1ed1i. 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